Self-talk is the ongoing mental dialogue we have with ourselves — that quiet voice in our minds that never really stops talking. It’s the voice that narrates our day, cheers us on, questions our choices, and sometimes even holds us back. Whether we’re fully aware of it or not, we’re always in conversation with ourselves.
Think about those little moments: when you look in the mirror before a big day and say, “You’ve got this.” Or when something goes wrong and you mutter, “I’m such a failure.” These thoughts might seem small, but they can have a big impact. That’s self-talk in action — and it matters more than we often realize.
At its core, self-talk can be either conscious or automatic. Some of it comes from deep within — shaped by our beliefs, childhood experiences, and emotional state. If you’ve grown up with a lot of criticism, you might find your inner voice mimics that tone. On the flip side, if you’ve experienced support and encouragement, your self-talk might lean more positive and reassuring.
Someone with helpful self-talk might think, “This is hard, but I’ve handled tough situations before.” Someone else might spiral into thoughts like, “I always mess things up.” One boosts confidence; the other chips away at it.
The good news? Self-talk isn’t fixed. It’s something we can become aware of — and work on. The first step is simply paying attention. Notice how you talk to yourself during the highs and the lows. Is your inner voice kind? Harsh? Encouraging? Judging?
Once we’re aware of our inner voice, we can start to challenge it and shift it. That doesn’t mean pretending everything is perfect, but rather learning to speak to ourselves the way we’d speak to someone we love — with patience, honesty, and compassion.
Your relationship with yourself is lifelong. Self-talk is a powerful part of that. So why not make it a little kinder?
Written By: –
Rtr. Inosha Nimsarani
(Prospect Member 2024-25)
Edited By: –
Rtr. Thisara Kuruppuarachchi
(Senior Blog Team Member 2024-25)
